fersakyn: (Not-Happy)
So... got a phone call from the human resources guy who hired me for my parttime gig teaching at an after-school center. I've been laid off. Wonderful. And he's been laid off too.

I have a bit of migraine right now. I imagine it's mostly stress-induced. I have to work on my dissertation, I have to find a new job, I feel like life's been handing me lemon after lemon, and I'm very sick of lemonade.

I recently completed paperwork to ask for a leave of absence so that I don't have to pay tuition. I used medical/health as my reason with a letter from a therapist I saw briefly. I hope it goes through, 'cuz right now I'm not seeing the point of finishing. I'm not seeing the point of anything. I am very stressed out and depressed.

The chair of my diss committee and even my mother were concerned over using medical/health reasons for my petition for leave. They worry that it could hurt me later down the road somehow. Right now, I can't seem to care. I'm not lying about my mental and physical states. I'm not sleeping well, my sleeping and eating patterns defy being termed "patterns" at all, I even feel queasy after eating sometimes, I'm getting headaches when before I could count the number of headaches I got in a year on one hand, blah, blah, blah. I have a list of ailments, nothing life-threatening, all stress-related.

Life's really not going well, and I have lost hope that it will go well.

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fersakyn

October 2011

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